Doin'

Ok, I made a therapy appointment.

I feel better today.

I talked with friends yesterday.

Both of them told me to get over myself. I have so much going for me now, and so much in my life, that I shouldn't be miserable.

I felt weak. The tough love seemed too tough. Then I asked one of them how is it that he can avoid being miserable.

He said...

What are you talking about? I AM miserable!

I swear to God, I laughed for five minutes straight.

Life, he said, is miserable. Happy comes in fleeting moments. You just have to learn to relish the fleeting moments and put your head down and trudge through the rest.

My other friend said it is all in the mind set. Some people are dying, or have lost the use of their limbs, and they are happier than me. Some Hollywood stars are living up in the hills, with all that I want, and they are putting a gun in their mouth right now.

They were right.

I think back to Annie Hall and the beginning where he is talking about the two old ladies at a restaurant. One says the food here is terrible, and the other says yeah, and such small portions.

Life is a journey of misery and pain, and it's over much too quickly.

I am going to print out some of the darkest posts here and bring them to therapy and try to reorganize my mind set.

The hysterical thing about yesterday is while I am being told by my friends how lucky I am, and how happy I should be, I got two phone calls.

One was from the studio, asking me when exactly my Bosnia trip is. They are planning on postponing the upcoming game show, but want to set the new date based on when I will be back in town.

The second was from a guy who asked me to join his improv troupe for a one night guest star slot in a week.

Two great phone calls. Two great friends. Two times two is four. I don't know what that means.

Then, last night, I wrote a sketch. Only took me about forty minutes. I'm going to go check right now to see if it is any good, but just getting it done was great!