Forward ho?

Well, I certainly don't write here that much. I was surprised to see that a week had already passed.

Things are getting better.

The office job is getting easier. I felt so much like I was incapable, but slowly I am getting it. I'm better on the phones, and the filing system that I'm in charge of is now getting results. I even taught my first class on Friday as the teacher booked a gig and they threw me in to sub. My own lesson plan for basic improv, and I conducted the three hour class with the older teens. I was impressed with myself. At the end of the week, it was nice to get a big ol check. Makes the time and swallowing up of life seem sort of worth it.

The old roomie is currently moving out. I have been replacing items as fast as I can, but I'm so busy, I just don't have any time to shop. I did go out and buy a new microwave, and it is metallic red. A deep brick red. I love it. One of the better influences my ex had on me was the embracing of color. Now I need art. Something to cover these barren walls.

Speaking of NB, I had breakfast with her this morning, and we signed all the legal papers for the finalization. She was emotional. For a variety of reasons, but some of it was this completion of what we had. Dealing with this always bums me out. I feel blah right now. Then again, I sit here with no TV ( roomie took it) and no music (also roomie) and blank spaces in my house and a lot of cleaning and reorganizing and painting to do in two days. Oh, and I have to work tonight and then for twelve hours tomorrow, and then ALL day Tues.

When am I gonna do it all? Who the fuck knows.

Still thinking about going on the anti depressants. Even though I am feeling better, I still have a numbness that I just can't shake. Ironic that drugs known for creating a numbness, might actually fight it as well. Let's hope. All the pysch's that my therapist recommended aren't in my health plan, so I have to just pick one. Eh. I hate that.

So...

I will try to write more. I probably won't, but I will try.