Letting this go

I just don't seem to write here anymore.

Partly, it is because I always seem to be so negative. I try to avoid that these days, because I feel it so often most times. I just never feel like kicking it in on purpose.

Last night, I watched Indecent Proposal on TV and the negative thoughts kicked in. I had to shut off the TV, and force myself to go to sleep so I would stop from spiraling.

Was a rough day yesterday. I took NB out to breakfast, and then got her to get her divorce papers finalized. This week I will take them into court and file them. That is the last step.

During the whole procedure, she cried. She mumbled if she is making any of the right choices in her life. She questioned whether or not she was having another nervous breakdown.

I tried to help. I tried to say the right things. I can't do anything more. I really feel alone too.

I am avoiding doing laundry. I really should. My next chance won't be until Saturday. Still, I don't want to, and probably won't.

The girl in the last post never called me back. She blew me off. Twice now.

I never heard again from TO. That one needs to die now.

I think I'm going to retreat a bit in the meeting girls game. I let some heart out, and it didn't go well. Retreat and regroup.

I'm dreading Christmas.

I'm dreading New Years.

One day at a time. That's fine, but then what is there to look forward to?