so...

A couple of days.

Highs and lows.

Friday I told the manager at work that I don't want to work the lunch shift anymore. He said ok.

In three weeks, my show will end and with the daytime off, I will finally have a day to myself. I look forward to it. I think one of the first things I will do is get out of town.

That night, TO came back. It was very anticlimactic. She was exhausted. Jet lag had her functioning as if it were 8am Saturday.

I played it cool. I was super jealous of her trip, and scared to be excited to see her. I played it cool.

Little jokes here and there. I felt like things were good, if not the flirty I enjoy so much. At one point before the show, she grabbed my face and sort of leaned it back. I didn't know what was going on, and she let go and walked away.

Then, after the show, we both pretty much ignored each other. She left without saying goodbye.

Some people say great, just what you would want. Others say too much head games and maybe she just left because she isn't in to you.

Who knows?

My show itself was good. On the whole, it was a wonky show, but I felt personally great.

I only did one scene. Usually, we get three.

I was a bit pissed about that. My friends said hey it's quality not quantity. You know, though, technically, I am still paying to be in this show. Even if someone else is paying it, my time is bought and damn I better get it.

The next day at rehearsal, we did an exercise which is brutal. Someone gets up and tries to entertain the group and as soon as anyone in the group "checks out" they get up and leave. When you have lost more than half your audience, your time is done. People usually last about 30 seconds.

It is brutal. I lasted 53 seconds by telling a fake story about spilling food on Roseanne.

Then, you tell the people why you walked out on them.

The whole troupe sort of devolved over time into defensiveness, and we cut rehearsal short. Our director said we could stick around if we wanted to talk about the shows, so some people did. I waited.

When they were done, I asked him if he felt I got back to my character. There was some talk after last week that I had lost my character. He said I had gotten back and did a good job. I then asked why then did I only get one scene. He was surprised. He said he didn't realize he only gave me one scene. He said he was thrown by someone being sick at the last minute and screwed up.

Fine. Doesn't really change my feelings, but it most likely won't happen again now.

Also talked to my dad on Sat. In two weeks, it will be two years since I have seen him. I think I am going home for Thanksgiving, since my sis will have her baby by then. He said he can't wait to see me. He said he misses me. That felt really good.

So, I took that feeling and ran with it.

I emailed TO.

Started off with a joke about the show and a scene she was in where the guy she played with accidentally showed his nuts.

She responded calling me hilarious.

I joked back. Then she joked back. Then, I joked again, and told her I was glad she was back because I missed her.

She wrote this morning saying AWWWWW!!! I missed you too!

Eh.

Sweet, but we'll see.

Party tonight. I'm looking forward to it. I'll probably talk to the same people I talk to every Friday night, but I really like them, so it's a good thing.