Amazing Malaise

What is wrong with me today?

I woke up just feeling so blue.

I shouldn't be blue. Things are kind of great right now.

True, our show bit hard last night. Really awful. But, we only have one more to do, and then it is back to the fun format. So, that shouldn't be the root.

After the show, someone started to ask about life, and I started to tell them. Everyone kind of tuned in, and suddenly everyone was giving me the pity face. I told them I am okay, though, and we even started to joke about it. As I left, someone even said, What no more "my wife is leaving me" stories? I mean, that is the sort of funny I like. Good natured ribbing. Did it get to me though? I don't think so, yet here I am, all blah.

Am I worried about this new gig? Will I be able to afford to actually do this? I could probably work day shifts at work. I think I can do it. I certainly will find out more on Monday night.

So, what's the problem? Why so poopy?

Maybe I am just lonely. Maybe I feel like I am having good news, and no one is there to hug me, and kiss me, and say, I always knew this would happen. No one to go out and get drunk with, or to come home and play "celebrity groupie" with.

Then again, I am a firm believer in the theory that the "universe" provides. If you need something, the forces that be, whatever they are, will make it happen. Somehow. So, maybe this is the start of the road that the "universe" wants me to take. Maybe I will meet the next girl while doing this show. Maybe everything I want is about to happen to me.

Still, today is crap.