I'm in it

Well, that mini milestone is now behind me.

I completed my first date in twelve years. I think it went well.

I don't think we are "right" for each other. I might date her still, but I don't know.

She is a very pleasant, sweet, and pretty girl. She wasn't as breath taking beautiful as I remembered her, but as the night went on, I grew to appreciate her beauty more.

She is also a bit high maintenance, a complete type A, and goes to bed at 10Pm ( I rarely get dinner before 10), and worst of all, is not only not really a drinker, but has a bit of an issue with people who are.

Those were kind of the kiss of death for me.

I am NOT looking for a high maintenance girl. Hopefully, there are some out there who aren't. Like I said, she was only a bit of one, and it could have been just a fluke. It would take more time to decide.

The type A thing doesn't really bother me, but they usually don't have much of a sense of humor. She seemed to have one, so that would be under review.

The early to bed thing is a serious problem. We would never see each other. We even joked that we would see each other next time our schedules aligned... in June.

The issue with drinkers is a deal breaker. Look, I don't mind if someone only has one or two. Plus, I am not a huge gotta get drunk guy, but I do like to drink, and generally have two or three. She said she doesn't like people who drink because she had some bad experiences, most recently with her ex boyfriend who "liked to drink too much, and was from Chicago too. What is it about you boys?"

So, right there I would forever be linked with the troublesome ex. Plus, I'm not looking for judgment in my life. I only want to judge.

Her positives were her humor, her ease at conversation, her kindness, her beauty, and her common interests.

We talked without a pause. We joked quite a bit, even at each other's expense (which showed our comfort with each other), she is a very sweet Midwest girl who places high values on family, and as I said, she grew prettier throughout. She also is a movie nut, and we had many similar interests.

The real problem with the night, and the sole thing that makes me wonder whether I should ask her out for a second is I didn't feel that drive to touch her. I mean, don't get me wrong. I am a guy. She is pretty, and I would have had no problem. I just didn't feel that butterfly in the stomach, wow you are what I want pretty thing.

Which in summation is all totally good.

I had my ice breaking date.

I did well.

I am charming, and can do it.

I wasn't nervous. I was before picking her up, but once in it, I just let myself be.

Also, I didn't fall in love on the first one. I was concerned there might be that bug inside me who was just looking for a female home. Not true. I am looking for one, but not desperately.

So, I don't really know about a second. I mean, we had a pleasant enough time that I guess we should try one more, but I know, from experience and age related wisdom, that there are qualities to her that would make this thing not work.

Do I still date, for practice and fun, even though I know it has no future?

I don't know if she wants to date me again.

I think she was a bit freaked out by my age. She asked me point blank how old I was, and when I answered she didn't believe me. It took me telling her five times before she dropped it, and then twenty minutes later she asked me again. I finally convinced her I was indeed 38 (she is 27), and she said she thought I was only 27. So, I don't know if that turned out to be a good thing, or bad.

I didn't kiss her at the end. Didn't seem right. I pulled up in front of her apartment (one of those neighborhoods where there is NO parking), and we made some pleasantries, and then we hugged and she left.

It was only 10PM!

I went home and had two more drinks and went to bed at my usual time. 2AM.